The Instagram ‘Made Me Do It’ Cushion
The other week I found myself doing something I’d never consciously intended to do. I was putting the cushions back on the bed (yes, cushions, not pillows! lol) and, without thinking, I pinched the top of each one to create that little dent in the middle. You know the one. It’s everywhere. Hotels. Home magazines. Instagram. Interior design videos. However, a few months ago, if you’d asked me what I thought of it, I’d probably have shrugged: "I prefer cushions the way they are."
Yet there I was, making the dent anyway. It made me stop and think. Not because I suddenly loved the look, but because I realised I wasn’t decorating for myself. Somewhere along the way, I’d quietly absorbed the idea that this is how cushions should look. It’s fascinating how often we do this. We adopt fashions we don’t particularly like. We use phrases everyone else uses. We arrange our homes, our wardrobes, and sometimes even our opinions in ways that quietly signal: I belong. Usually, nobody tells us to. There’s no committee deciding the correct way to style a couch or a bed. No rulebook. Just thousands of tiny exposures to the same image until our brain files it under "correct."
Psychologists call this social proof. When we're uncertain, we look to others for clues on how to belong and shield ourselves from judgment.
It reminded me of being in school and painstakingly changing my handwriting to match the popular girl sitting next to me. (Spoiler: it didn't make me any more popular, but my 14-year-old brain was convinced that copying her surface details was the ticket to belonging). We do the exact same thing as adults. When a guest walks into our home and sees that familiar cushion dent, their brain quietly registers: Ah, this space is curated. It's correct. We adopt these subtle visual cues so we don't feel out of step. It’s a useful shortcut, but it has a downside: familiarity often disguises itself as preference. Eventually, we lose sight of whether we genuinely like something, or if we’ve just seen it enough times to accept it.
Of course, there’s nothing wrong with seeking inspiration or leaning on experts when interior design isn't our forte, leveraging someone else’s talent is just smart. The trap isn't taking inspiration; it's when we stop asking if we actually like the result.
Which brings me to the subtle irony of this blog. Here I am, writing about how we blindly adopt trends, while hoping you'll fall in love with my fragrance products and see them in your home. So consider this an invitation to pause. When was the last time you bought a scent because the notes genuinely spoke to your spirit, rather than because it was 'in season'?
It isn’t really about cushions, and it isn't about candles. It’s about noticing those quiet moments in our daily routines and asking: Did I choose this… or did it choose me?
Ready to curate a space that genuinely grounds your nervous system - cushion dent optional? (Explore the Candle Warmer Collection)